What I Wish I Knew Earlier About Leadership and Success

I wish I had known, when I was younger, the key elements of being a great leader and making a meaningful impact in both the marketplace and the world.

But I didn’t.

I’m sad to say—it took me far too long to put the pieces together. I was well into my career before I truly understood what great leadership looks like. Now, in the fifth inning of my adult life, I feel like I’m finally beginning to play the game well.

Like many, my parents had their own lids on what they believed was possible. They did their best, but they didn’t model the attributes that would have set me up for the highest levels of success. I was close to my dad, but he was often away for work. My mom—though good-hearted—lacked the self-esteem and strength to lead our home, and my brother was intellectually disabled and required much of her attention.

And let’s be honest—the workplace isn’t the best place to learn great leadership either. A Gallup study revealed that only 20% of U.S. employees strongly agree they trust their organization’s leadership, exposing a massive trust gap.

Looking back on my decades in the marketplace, I can count on one hand the number of leaders who truly stood out as shining examples.

So, I did what I had to do: I learned how to make it on my own.

From a young age, I was driven to succeed. I wanted to do things the right way—to achieve, to excel. But without strong mentorship, I took the very long way around the mountain. My success grew exponentially over the decades, but it was built on whatever raw talent I possessed, rather than the deeper leadership principles that create lasting impact.

I didn’t learn, early on, the skills that can create and elevate true leadership:

• Inspiring and empowering others to reach their full potential—because leadership isn’t about getting ahead alone, it’s about bringing others with you.
• Mastering the art of influence and communication—because your ability to lead is only as strong as your ability to connect, challenge, and inspire.
• Shifting from personal achievement to lasting impact in the lives of others—because the most meaningful success isn’t measured by what you gain, but by the value you create for others.

Ironically, success itself can sometimes keep us from the deeper lessons we need to learn to become truly impactful. When we’re successful “enough,” it’s easy to assume we’re on the right path—only to realize later that we might not be building the right kind of success.

I eventually discovered that I had been climbing the ladder of success, but I hadn’t invested enough in climbing the ladder of values, especially the value of other people.

When I began coaching, I saw firsthand just how much we all need encouragement and affirmation to step into our full potential. Every person we meet has the potential and desire to grow—but also more self-doubt, fear and inner resistance than we can imagine.

As I watched my clients achieve amazing goals, I realized the sheer power of believing in them, encouraging them, sharing wisdom, and truly investing in their vision and success.

Why This Matters

Many professionals in their early or mid-career may be in the same boat I found myself in—achieving success but missing the deeper leadership evolution. They’re so focused on their WHAT that they haven’t fully explored their WHY.

And research backs this up. Employees’ perceptions of their managers’ leadership skills significantly impact workplace performance. Gallup’s research underscores that managers play a crucial role in shaping engagement and success—yet so many leaders focus on quick wins and short-term results instead of the deeper transformations they can foster in their teams, which can make lasting success inevitable.

The great news, however, is that studies also show that effective leadership development programs lead to tangible improvements in how employees perceive their leaders and ultimately improves engagement and production. The research found that employees experienced a positive change when their leaders participated in a two-year development program, underscoring the value of ongoing leadership training (Gallup, PubMed).

So, let me ask you—as a leader of your business, team or even just yourself,

• Are you climbing the ladder of success—but forgetting to build your ladder of values?
• Are you leading for short-term wins, or are you developing other leaders around you?
• Is your leadership defined by your title, or by the inspirational impact you have on those around you?

The best leaders aren’t just successful—they’re significant. They change the world by elevating the lives of others.

Our Leadership Legacy Starts Now

True leaders don’t hoard knowledge, skills and vision—they pass it on. They’re intentional about mentoring and developing everyone on their team. They want others to win as much as they want to win.

I know I needed a lot of help in developing this mindset, and maybe you do too. Look around—you’re not alone! The world today is starving for great, inspirational leaders. Join me in this work and decide to be that kind of leader today!

If this resonates with you, let’s talk. Whether it’s a conversation, coaching, or a simple shift in mindset, we all have opportunities to lead at a higher level.

👉 What’s one leadership lesson you wish you had learned earlier? Share your insights in the comments!

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