What I Wish I Knew About Coaching (Part 3)

But didn’t learn until I became a Certified Life Coach – Part 3

My commitment to you

When I coach a client, I am 100% committed to serving them as their COACH during our time together.  This is different from chatting with a friend or getting counseling. Coaching is focused on YOU and your FUTURE growth, unlike counseling which is more focused on problems from the past.

Coaches are trained to not “get in the pool” with clients.  This means that we don’t jump into the problem and agree with your story.  For example, if you say you are just too busy to spend time with your family, if I believe your story and say, “oh my, of course, you can’t.  That’s a crazy schedule,” we both have lost all ability to grow.  In reality, we all make time for what is most important to us.  As a coach, I will not believe your story and will encourage you consider other possible options.

Also, because coaching is focused completely on serving you, I don’t need you to reassure me or worry about my feelings.  I am there to 100% serve YOU, and your reactions are not going to impact how I feel about myself or my coaching abilities.  I am sincerely okay.  This is an important boundary.  Growth is most likely when you are honest with yourself and with me, even when that is uncomfortable.

Most of us have told ourselves the same stories over and over and over for years (or others have handed us our story).  When I am coaching, I am trained to listen for the things that don’t match up . . . the words that don’t match the feelings, or the feelings that don’t match the actions, or the results that don’t match the words and thoughts.  This is where I can offer up the beautiful gift of self-discovery and transformation if the client is coachable and open to considering the questions I raise.

My commitment to anyone I coach is for them to experience true, potentially life-altering  transformation.  That means I can let them feel their discomfort when they are bumping up against old ways of thinking without feeling like I need to rescue or comfort them or make them feel better. I can let them process their own emotions and be responsible for their own emotional maturity.  I know they will enjoy all the “feel goods” they want AFTERWARDS, when they KNOW they have faced the pain, done the hard work, and mastered the goals they set for themselves (and at that point, everyone else can see the change too so you will  get double “feel goods”). YOU have the most power to make yourself feel good when you engage in the power of transformation.

Your next steps

Mental and spiritual peace and contentment are rare commodities today.  Coaching is a valuable way for a functioning, healthy person like you to purposefully move forward and commit to ongoing growth.  It takes work, but the rewards are immeasurable.  I hope some insight into how coaching can work for you will lead you to search for great coaching partners who can encourage your own future growth. I would love an opportunity to serve you.  Your God-given awesomeness is unlimited!!!  You are blessed.

“Blessed is the one who finds wisdom and the one who gets understanding” (Proverbs 3:13).